Living-your-best-life

Simple steps to improve EVERY day

By now, you all know I write blogs about living your best life, with an additional travel blog thrown in now and again. Over the past four years, I’ve shared my experiences, exploring and testing various strategies to improve every aspect of our lives—health, relationships, career, and personal growth. Living with a debilitating autoimmune disease has been a significant part of my journey.

I’ve tried to avoid overly fluffy inspiration. I mean, “living your best life” conjures up images of flawless yoga poses on a beach at sunrise, but let’s be real: for most of us, it’s more like juggling flaming torches on a unicycle while praying the smoke alarm doesn’t go off. Between the avalanche of self-help books, overpriced wellness gadgets, and those annoyingly perfect Instagram influencers, it’s easy to feel like you’re one kale smoothie away from cracking the code. But hopefully, my blogs take real life into account, and I include insights from my professional experience, training, and actionable tips. I hope you’ve found them to be an honest account of what has worked for me and what hasn’t.

With that in mind, this month, I’ll discuss simple steps to improve every day by setting goals and sticking to them. But first, let me explain why we need them!

Goals give us a sense of purpose. Without goals, we feel lost, indecisive, and often unhappy. We may also feel directionless, unmotivated, and stuck in a cycle of routine without purpose.

Many of us lead incredibly busy lives and become too preoccupied to focus on what truly matters. Concentrating on the goals that shape our dreams can be challenging, but it is essential to prioritise them. Doing so isn’t selfish; everyone around you benefits when you achieve your aspirations.

Additionally, some people lack motivation and spend excessive time on platforms like Twitter, Instagram, YouTube, or Facebook instead. Although they may have good intentions, they often put off their goals for another day and another!

Now, you’re beginning to see why so few people truly live their best lives. And it gets even more difficult because if we ever get around to setting our goals, we rarely stick to them. So here’s the best bit: I’ll share some very simple tips on how to make goals work for you.

Before I do, I want to recognise those going through an incredibly difficult time. Setting goals might be beneficial for you as well. Goals can help keep your thoughts focused instead of drifting into worst-case scenarios. They also allow you to channel your energy and inspire hope, essential for overcoming the despair you may be feeling; remember, it won’t last forever.

So, let’s start by thinking about our aspirations. Jamie and I had some big goals. Earlier in our life they revolved around family, career progression and saving as much as we could for our future. When we set up our own business, we had a financial and business plan, but we didn’t lose sight of our longer-term goal to be as fit as possible and mortgage-free by the time we reached 60 and then see as much of the world as we can 😊

Your goals can vary widely dependent on where you are in your life. For instance, you might aim for financial stability and create a longer-term plan to reduce debt. Alternatively, your focus could be on personal growth and development, practising mindfulness, or even exploring a new hobby.

Now that you’ve thought it over and made your choices, you’re ready for the important part. I try to keep things as simple as possible for those like me who have a short attention span. It couldn’t be easier than this, but YOU STILL HAVE TO DO IT!

Write them down. Carefully. … If you don’t, you won’t achieve them!
Tell someone. Telling someone you know about your goals increases the likelihood that you’ll stick to them.
Break your goals down. This is especially important for big goals. …
Plan your first step. …
Keep going. Every day will get better as you take pride in your progress.
Don’t give up; treat life’s obstacles like a game of dodgeball: duck, weave, and continue moving forward.
Celebrate even the small steps

“Setting goals is like telling your future self, ‘Hey, let’s make sure we don’t disappoint each other this time.’ Whether your goal is to get fit and run a 5K or to stop losing socks in the washing machine, it’s important to start small, dream big, and maybe keep a snack handy for those moments when you need a little motivation to keep going.”

Finally, a big thank you for sticking around. Share this with your friends if you liked it or your enemies if you didn’t; they deserve the confusion 😊

Until next time xx

South Africa: Leopard Mountain Safari Experience

As regular readers know, I write about living the best life possible despite the challenges and struggles that come our way. I find my greatest happiness in connecting with nature—one of the reasons we chose to move to Cornwall and why we regularly hike in the mountains. Research indicates that people who choose this connection to nature are generally happier. Nature evokes calmness and creativity while enhancing our ability to concentrate, an aspect often disrupted by today’s fast-paced lifestyle. With that in mind, I’m going to share a recent experience which I can truly say has been the best (so far 😊)

Thanks to our friends in South Africa, we achieved our dream. We booked a stay at Leopard Mountain Lodge in the stunning Manyoni Private Game Reserve. As one of the largest privately owned reserves, Manyoni is in the heart of Zululand and is a protected area for the “Big Five.” The reserve was formed when landowners removed internal fences to create a sprawling 23,000-hectare area with conservation as a top priority. It’s also a haven for endangered species like the cheetah and black rhino.

We planned a three-night stay, arriving shortly after lunch on day 1, and I was genuinely captivated by the stunning bush views from the large balcony, where we were served a welcome drink. Our room offered a perfect retreat, exuding calmness and privacy, complete with a hammock on the veranda and the delightful sounds of birdsong and cicadas bustling about. To my joy, wildlife thrived all around us, nibbling through the underbrush and nearby trees. We soon discovered that our balcony’s freshwater plunge pool was a favourite spot for the impalas and nyalas, blissfully ignoring our presence. Leopard Mountain felt like a hidden paradise!

Our first game drive was scheduled for 4 PM. Each day includes six hours of drives, from 5 AM to 8 AM and from 4 PM to 7 PM. Times vary according to sunrise/sunset, and I couldn’t wait to begin our journey through Africa’s untamed wilderness. We met our guide, Alex, and climbed aboard a fully open jeep, which was more comfortable than I had anticipated. Our first sight was a herd of striped zebra grazing in a savannah valley and a towering giraffe craning its neck to nibble on the tree.

Spending this time with our friends was fantastic; we all shared a love for off-roading, and Alex quickly realised we were up for any challenge. The reserve had experienced unprecedented rain the week before, making the tracks difficult to navigate, especially off the main routes. However, nothing was too difficult for Alex, and within the first hour, he made our visit truly special. He spotted two lionesses resting in the tall grass ahead. At first glance, they appeared gentle and serene as they lounged around, but then one of them approached us. She stood before the jeep, talking to us with deep, guttural growls. We could hear the other lioness behind the trees crunching the bones of her recent kill.

Being with Alex was amazing. With eight years of experience at the lodge, his deep knowledge of the reserve and the wildlife truly shone through. He shared fascinating insights in an engaging manner, and no question was too difficult. Before returning for dinner, we stopped in the bush, where Alex produced cold wine and beer. I was very impressed that the bush had “wine o’clock,” too. We stood there, enjoying the sunset, soaking in the nocturnal ambience while chatting about what we had seen.

Dinner was served in the boma, illuminated by lanterns and a roaring campfire. The food was incredible, and it was great to meet other guests from around the world and share our game drive experiences. After dinner, we were escorted back to our room, which is standard practice after dark, as you never know who might show up for an evening snack! Our first night sleeping in the bush was quite an experience. A mix of strange, wonderful, and somewhat scary noises echoed around us, yet I felt completely calm until the 4 AM alarm! This set the stage for an unforgettable morning.

Poaching remains a significant issue for wildlife reserves, particularly rhinos, now classified as endangered. For centuries, rhino horn has been used in traditional Chinese medicine, leading to the killing of these splendid animals for supposed “cures.” Reserves like the Manyoni have had to make difficult decisions to protect them, which means trimming their horns to save their lives. Our timing to visit Leopard Mountain coincided with the vet’s visit; what we witnessed will live with me forever.

We set off at 5 AM for an exhilarating 45-minute drive across the reserve. As we cruised in our open-top jeep, the sun gradually rose, painting the sky with breathtaking colours and illuminating the Savannah ahead. Upon our arrival, the helicopter landed with the vet on board. Manyoni has trackers on their rhinos to help locate them once the helicopter is airborne. We followed in the jeep, and no time was wasted getting to the area where the helicopter was circling, with the vet hanging out the side, ready to tranquillise his target.

Watching this huge, magnificent animal fall to the ground as the tranquiliser took effect was so emotional. The helicopter landed, and once the vet had given his OK, we approached the sedated rhino. The trim consisted of removing part of the horn from the rhino without damaging the growth plate or causing any harm or pain. When poachers remove the horn, they cut the entire las phalanx, which results in the animal bleeding to death. The vet did an amazing job, and the best part of the morning was watching the rhino wake, shake himself off and wander off to find his mates back in the bush.

I will never forget being so close to this wonderful animal, but understanding what the reserves must go through to protect their wildlife was bittersweet.

The remaining morning drives were equally as good as the evening ones. During our stay, we spotted an incredible variety of birds, insects, and animals (including the big 5) —way too many to list here, but I’d be happy to share details if you send me a message. Following the morning game drives, breakfast was superb. We then had the whole day free until the next adventure at 4. While our friends enjoyed relaxing spa treatments, Jamie and I chose to hang out with the wonderful wildlife visiting our pool and I chatted away like a modern version of Dr Doolittle.

The finale came on our last evening drive. The elephants had been elusive, and due to the rain, the road we needed to take to find them was impassable, even for Alex’s expert off-roading skills. However, that evening, while we sat watching a female cheetah with her two cubs, Alex had a call through on his radio to say the elephants had made their way to our side of the reserve and were about 20 minutes away. We sped along with no time to stop for giraffes, zebras, cheetahs, or lions. Our destination was to see the elephants, hoping they were still around. Along the way, we encountered four rhinos blocking the road. One became a bit stroppy when we tried to pass, so we had to wait patiently for them to move at their own pace.

Once we were on the move again, we crested a hill and were greeted by the sight of a herd of 27 elephants walking towards us. What struck me most was the peace they exuded. I couldn’t believe such large animals could convey a sense of serenity. Watching them walk towards us while looking out for one another was truly magical.

I didn’t want to leave Leopard Mountain; I felt strongly connected to nature and wildlife. It gave me a sense of total peace, which is rarely found in today’s hectic life.

A safari is not just a journey; it’s an awakening of our senses. You can’t beat starry nights and “jeep hair”. You know you’re truly alive when you’re living among lions 😊

Until next time xx

The Rugged Mountains of Alicante

What an incredible week it has been! I hope this blog captures the essence of our hiking adventure and shares all the wonderful moments we experienced. Additionally, I aim to provide useful information for anyone seeking an alternative way to destress and free their mind from constant worries. Stay tuned for the journey!

We ventured into the region’s hidden mountains, just an hour’s drive from Alicante Airport. This area feels like a different world, with terraced slopes adorned by charming small villages that ascend toward rugged limestone peaks rising over a thousand meters into the sky.

This was our fourth hiking holiday, and it did not disappoint. Armed with our maps and GPS, we arrived at our first destination, Tàrbena, just in time for a late afternoon beer. Juan, the owner of this super guest house, greeted us and showed us our room, which had fantastic views of the village, the mountains, and the Mediterranean Sea in the distance. He was one of the most welcoming people we have ever met!

The village is surrounded by almond groves, creating a serene and authentic Spanish atmosphere. One of the aspects I cherish most about these getaways is immersing myself in the local culture and life in the mountains. Juan mentioned that the food we would be served was prepared using locally sourced ingredients and was delicious! Many of Juan’s dishes included foods Jamie and I had never tried, such as artichokes.

The next morning would be our first walk, and there’s nothing like an early start! Juan explained that a wild Boar hunt was due to commence at 11 am, and we needed to be through the first 10K before it started. With our picnic lunch safely packed in our rucksacks, I was keen to get past the hunting area as I didn’t want dinner eating my lunch. Nor did I want to be mistaken for a wild Boar 😊

Apart from dodging the world’s best cyclists training in the area, complete with their tour cars, we made it through the day without any drama. This wonderful first day’s hike set the tone for the rest of our holiday. We explored a variety of landscapes, including moorland, pinewoods, and orchards filled with oranges, lemons, almonds, and olives. The scenery was impressive, with huge limestone rocks rising dramatically to form sheer cliffs and deep valleys. Pine trees, shrubs, and early wildflowers clung to the rocky terrain.

After two wonderful days, we moved on to our next location. A long, tough walk took us to the village of Castell de Castells, where we would stay for three nights in a beautifully restored nineteenth-century townhouse. This property had been in the same family for over 100 years. The winding, narrow, and steep streets created a wonderfully peaceful atmosphere. The only interruptions to the tranquillity were the church bells ringing every hour and every half hour!

Pilar, the owner, prepared the most delicious homemade evening meals, which we enjoyed in the intimate, softly lit vaulted cellar. We savoured local wine and engaged in wonderful conversations as we met other walkers on the same schedule. Before dinner, we watched the sun go down on the roof terrace with an ice-cold beer, feeling happy and relaxed.

I’d now like to take a moment to explain why we felt so good and why hiking is helpful for mental well-being. After completing a tough walk, your body releases endorphins. When you combine this with nature, sunlight, and breathtaking scenery, your brain experiences a significant boost. Much research suggests that this activity can create a flow state of mind.

In a flow state, distractions diminish, and time appears to pass unnoticed, which makes it incredibly beneficial. Research has shown that flow is associated with decreased activity in brain areas linked to self-focus. This connection helps explain why experiencing flow can divert us from stress and worry, and I can personally vouch for its effectiveness. Other activities, such as sports, can have the same positive effect.

Back on track (excuse the pun), on our third transfer day to our last destination, we had two choices: the long walk or a shortened version involving a taxi ride. We opted for the long route, and we weren’t disappointed. Again, we were in awe of the scenery and a spa bath looking out onto the terrain we had just walked was a welcome luxury on our arrival.

Jamie and I laughed through dinner, interested in the menu options. We decided to start with pasta, which arrived looking like a five-course meal and also included three doughnuts each. Naturally, we chose the wild “bear” dish for our main course, which, as it turned out, was wild boar 😊. We had an unusual combination of bread, chocolate, oil, and salt for dessert. You might think this pairing sounds odd, as we did, but it tasted amazing. And if you’re horrified by our choices, vegetarian options were available.

Before I leave, I need to talk about our last hike. This trail covers all three surrounding gorges, including the famous Barrac de L’Infern (Hell’s Ravine). It’s a challenging route that requires a decent fitness level to complete. After the first steep descent and halfway up the ascent out of the first gorge, I seriously questioned my motivation, but it did improve. We encountered two Spanish guys at the foot of the third gorge before the final ascent. I was surprised that their rest stops included a couple of cigarettes, especially considering their climbing speed! This hike, often called the “Cathedral of Hiking,” was truly memorable.

For a week, life for us felt like a mountain rather than a beach but passing by the beach on the way back to the airport looked very appealing.

I headed home, feeling a sense of post-hike blues. My mind was no longer in flow, and this emotion seemed counterintuitive after a long hike; shouldn’t I feel revitalised instead of worn out? The truth is that, like hormonal shifts, my body needs time to adjust to being back home. The “Eat, Sleep, Hike, Repeat” routine had put us into the flow, which was fantastic during the hike, but transitioning back felt sad; I wanted to be back in the mountains exploring wonderful landscapes.

You’ll be pleased to know I’m fine now and raring to go! But where to? With my new self-appointed job as a travel writer I could end up anywhere!

Until next time xxxx

One powerful tip for a better 2025

First, let me say Happy New Year, and good luck sticking to your New Year’s resolution. Last year, I decided to teach my facial expressions how to express their inner voice. It has worked somewhat, but I can’t get rid of the eye roll, so that’s my focus for this year.

Before you make your resolution, I want to share the most valuable advice I’ve ever received. Someone once told me it was the best tip I would ever get, and I can confidently say they were right. If you take this advice, you’ll feel happier, less anxious, and more in control; imagine that!

So, what is it, I hear you ask? Let me explain.

We all have a worst enemy, and you might be surprised to learn that it’s not the “know it all” mother in your school WhatsApp group or the workplace bully. It’s something far worse, a constant nagging commentary that lingers in your head 24/7—our inner voice. Sometimes, it offers a helpful idea, but more often than not, it’s negative. When it finally goes quiet, we worry about what it’s plotting next, and hey presto, it’s back!

This inner voice reminds you that the crisis you’re experiencing will lead to the worst possible outcome, almost like a detailed itinerary of all the negative possibilities. This gremlin also surfaces as you fall asleep, casting doubt over everything you’ve accomplished during the day. Additionally, it seems to criticise your outfit just before you go out. For me, it often appears when I’m writing my blogs, making me feel like I’m wasting my time since no one will read them. 😊

Vincent Van Gogh got it right when he said, “If you hear a voice in your head saying you can’t paint, then paint, and that voice will be silenced.” Vincent echoed the advice I received but I’ll try to add some detail and helpful takeaways.

So, how do we silence the pesky thing?

Let’s begin by giving it a name. Naming helps us acknowledge its presence and allows us to observe when and how it appears. Fun options like “Nagging Nelly” or “Perfect Pete” come to mind, but they feel too long for me. Instead, short names like “Midge” or “HIC” (Hidden Inner Critic) or something playful that makes you smile might be easier to relate to.

Next, we need to learn techniques to eliminate it. We can’t live our best lives with a gremlin who continually sabotages our success in both our professional and personal lives, disrupts our sleep, and makes us unnecessarily anxious.

Perhaps you didn’t apply for that job because you couldn’t meet two of the ten required competencies. Maybe you didn’t ask for a pay raise this year because you didn’t feel it was justified. After all, the gremlin might reason that if you deserved a pay raise, your employer would have given you one. Perhaps your day is full of worry instead of laughter because you always think about a worst-case scenario planted in your head by our nemesis.

However, now that you have a name, you’re more aware of its presence, and you have the power to tell it to “bugger off”. I might use “different words” in a more private setting, but they wouldn’t be appropriate for my blog 😊. This approach may help you block it out temporarily, but here’s what you must do if it returns. This advice I’ve followed works: don’t worry about how silly you might look or sound; just crack on.

When you wake up in the morning and take a look at yourself in the bathroom mirror, the first words out of your mouth should always be, “Gremlin (replace with chosen name) is an a**hole”, and repeat it 3 times. Trust me; it will banish that irritating inner voice for the day and equally put a smile on your face.

Don’t get me wrong; I’m not saying you should ignore your intuition or gut feeling; ignore the Gremlin. It will be mightily peeved, but stay strong, and you’ll beat it.

Moving on, my focus for 2005 is recognising that health involves much more than exercise and proper nutrition. It encompasses having a healthy mindset, surrounding ourselves with positive people, cultivating uplifting habits, and embracing gratitude.

Remember, there are two rules in life.

Never share all the information

On that note, Alexa, I’d be very grateful if you could take down the Christmas decorations.

Until next time xx

Unlocking the power of Emotional Intelligence can transform your life—do you possess this vital skill?

Hi everyone, it’s me again. I appreciate that this is my second blog in a month, but after researching, I’ve realised I need to challenge my brain more. Now that I’m retired, I’ve noticed that at least 80% of my day revolves around active pursuits like yoga, gym, hiking, and photography—I’m rarely still. I also enjoy reading and love writing, so I’ve decided to focus on those activities more. I bet you can’t wait to read more of my thoughts! My last blog about St. Agnes garnered the highest readership this year, so here we go again!

When I wrote about this topic last year, it was my most popular post in the four years I’ve been blogging. Today, I want to take a different approach to the same subject: Emotional Intelligence, or EQ. I hope you find some valuable takeaways from it, as, apparently, it’s the key to happiness.

First, let’s clarify what Emotional Intelligence (EQ) is: it refers to our ability to manage our own emotions while also understanding the feelings of others. EQ consists of four key elements: self-awareness, self-regulation, social awareness, and social skills. I’ll explain these components further later in this blog.

On a personal note, I don’t wish to blow my own trumpet, but remarkably, I have a high EQ score. I only mention this to establish my credibility in this area. Thankfully, this is a positive trait, especially since I suspect my IQ score is rather average. 😊

How do I know this? Without going into too much detail, I was tested in my last proper job, a relatively senior role. As part of the management team, we needed to recognise our strengths and weaknesses to communicate effectively and lead our team to the best of our ability, ultimately resulting in a happier workforce. Therefore, we all underwent a full analysis day, followed by an official emotional intelligence (EQ) test.

Let me share an example. I personally dislike excessive detail, but some people thrive on it, and that’s simply how they communicate. Having a high emotional intelligence (EQ) means that instead of looking bored, I can recognise that my impatience isn’t a good trait. Even though I understand what they are saying within the first few seconds, I remain attentive for the next 5 minutes and don’t lose my sh*t. That’s being self-aware.

Some of our management team members had low emotional intelligence (EQ) scores. This didn’t make them better or worse than me; it simply highlighted our differences. I worked alongside incredibly intelligent people—many of whom were much smarter than I am—and I often wondered how I ended up in my position. I can only guess that my high EQ enabled me to navigate through all the difficult times.

So, let’s look at what’s possible and what you can take away from reading my blog.

Firstly, can you increase your IQ, or are you born smart? Sorry, folks, but experts generally agree there’s no effective method to boost intelligence directly. Factors like diet, brain training, exercise, willpower, or inspiration do not significantly affect IQ. However, some researchers have found that a rigorous academic curriculum can improve IQ scores, but only slightly.

But all is not lost. While we may not be able to boost our intelligence significantly, we can elevate our emotional intelligence (EQ) at any stage in life. The exciting part is that the skills associated with EQ can be learned and refined! It’s vital to understand that grasping EQ concepts is just the start; putting them into practice is where the real transformation happens. Even if emotional intelligence doesn’t come effortlessly, with dedication, mastering these invaluable skills is entirely achievable!

So, what are the traits of people with high EQs?

Number one is Self-awareness. It’s an incredible skill that allows us to recognise and understand our emotions and how they affect those around us. It’s the foundation of emotional intelligence (EQ) and supports all other aspects of it.

When we develop self-awareness, we unlock the power of self-regulation—the ability to manage our emotions and behaviors effectively. This journey starts with recognizing our feelings, which helps us maintain control during challenging situations. Individuals with strong self-regulation can pause and take a deep breath in tense moments instead of losing their temper, throwing objects, and slamming the door on their way out. I know! this is difficult!

Next is social awareness. Those who score highly in this area can empathise with others and grasp their emotions, fostering stronger connections.

Finally, social skills are the hallmark of a greatness. These skills encompass influencing others, managing conflicts, and inspiring those around us. Mastering these abilities is essential for nurturing and sustaining healthy relationships in all areas of life, not just at work.

Imagine this scenario: you’ve had a stressful day at work, it’s nearly Christmas, and you still haven’t done any shopping. To make matters worse, Sainsbury’s delivered six bottles of wine instead of your entire Christmas order because you mistakenly left them in your holding basket. On top of that, the kids have just finished school for the holidays! Those of us with high EQ can stop ourselves from poking our own eyes out, screaming, or drowning our sorrows in wine. But it does take practice😊

On that note, with my self-awareness skills fully engaged, I will say goodbye before I bore you to death. If you managed to read to the end, well done! If you gave up halfway through, you missed the best part.

Ho Ho Ho and a bottle of Merlot, until next time xx

St Agnes, Cornwall

I get so many messages asking, “Where do you live”?, so I thought the easiest way to reply was through a short blog. As many of my readers know, I write about life events and the challenges of living with an autoimmune disease. I’m also a travel writer and photographer, and whilst I’m not getting paid for this one, yet 😊, it combines both subjects, life and travel, so here goes….

We live in St Agnes, on the North Coast of Cornwall, between Newquay and St Ives. When you leave Devon and see the “Welcome to Cornwall” sign, we’re another 56 miles southwest down the A30. You don’t quite fall off the end of England, but we’re close. We had been holidaying in St Agnes for about 20 years before we finally made the big decision to move here from the Surrey commuter belt.

Following many hard-working years, with long but enjoyable days in the City of London, we decided to embrace the freedom and joy that retirement offers, using the hard-earned savings from our working years to enjoy life to the fullest. I’ve always loved the weather in Cornwall, whatever the season. We are heavily influenced by the Gulf Stream, resulting in a mild, maritime climate with more sunshine and warmer temperatures than other parts of the UK. The Winters are milder than most of the UK, too, but with lots of dramatic storms regularly roaring in from the Atlantic,

It’s not that this was an influencing factor, but St Agnes houses six amazing bars/pubs, one of which was recently voted “best in the UK”—yes, the best pub in the whole of the UK! Two are located in Trevaunance Cove, our magnificent sandy beach nestled below the high cliffs. It’s great for families and surfers alike, with plenty of rock pools to explore at low tide.

Each pub regularly hosts live music, quiz nights, DJs, and even the occasional beer festival. The variety of food is amazing, with a superb array of seafood, including the best fresh lobster available. We also feature a superb Indian restaurant.

Jamie and I love them all, but my favourite is the one that transports you to Hawaii for the night, even in the depths of winter. It exudes a unique charm that’s fun and uplifting, even on a damp day. We also have three breweries, a great butcher, a bakery renowned throughout Cornwall, fresh veg shops, a delightful antique shop and many more. Our fish and chip shop is five-star, and you can’t beat a freshly cooked fish supper to take up to the cliffs and watch the magnificent sunsets. Oh, and a couple of tinnies from the breweries, too 😊.

The first time Jamie and I visited Australia, we loved the café breakfast culture, which we also have here, with one café right on the beach. What can be better than drinking proper coffee while storm-gazing in the Winter, watching the expertise of the surfers riding the waves in Spring and Autumn, or the turquoise glistening waters and white sand in the Summer. Next door to the café is one of the bars serving wine, beer, and excellent pizzas, for all your stunning evening sea views too

Now, you might think that’s all, but it isn’t. Our house is only a few minutes walk from most of the eating and drinking venues I’ve mentioned, but here’s the thing: It’s also a few minutes walk to the top of the breathtaking cliffs, where you can stand and admire the glittering expanse of the Atlantic Ocean, spot dolphins swimming alongside the fishing boats or walk along one of the most magnificent sections of the southwest coastal path.

Whilst we have the sunniest climate in the UK, if you prefer basking in 24/7 sunshine by the pool, Cornwall may not be your ideal destination. You’ll want to pack a summer hoodie, and your Ibiza attire should be swapped out for shorts and flip-flops. My wardrobe is filled with clothes and high-heeled shoes that are now relegated to my weekly dusting routine; that’s the only time they get my attention! If you don’t swim or surf, I suggest avoiding matching dry robes for you and your partner, as they look weird.

If you want to visit in the winter, be prepared, as our ferocious storms don’t receive names or colourful warnings from the Met Office. They are wild and dramatic, making them perfect for my new hobby: photography. I love trying to capture the waves breaking around the rocks in the shallows. The foam crests become chaotic, creating what surfers refer to as “messy” seas.

We’re also steeped in history. St Agnes was recently featured in BBC’s “Villages by the Sea” informing us that ‘St Agnes tin is the finest tin in Cornwall’. The area produced some of the best tin ore in the world, including ‘diamond’ tin, which needed little processing. Our historic mining landscape is included as one of the ten areas of the Cornish Mining World Heritage Site.

People are said to be happiest and healthiest in small, picturesque Mediterranean villages, largely due to their friendly lifestyles and nutritious diets. We believe we have that experience here in Cornwall. Jamie plays league cricket for Gulval, a village team that boasts one of the best views from any wicket in the country. He also plays for Cornwall in the over-60s, and through cricket, we have made many new friends across the county.

Many of our friends are “blown-ins,” like Jamie and I, who have made their home in this magnificent county. Leaving our previous home was a big step, but it’s only a four-hour drive, and most people here regularly make the journey to visit friends and family up-country. We have daily flights from Newquay Airport to London, as well as an excellent train service to the big City! Our house is a 20-minute drive from the airport and only 20 minutes from Truro, Cornwall’s big city, where we enjoy a superb theatre and, more importantly, my new hairdresser. We’re still season ticket holders at Wimbledon, and our trips to visit family somehow always coincide with home games. 😊

Making life-changing decisions is difficult, but you must be brave to embrace retirement and truly enjoy it. Life here is relaxed, and we hope our grandchildren will create wonderful memories during their time in St. Agnes. Two of Cornwall’s biggest summer festivals, Boardmasters and Tunes in the Dunes, are just a bus ride away, and we can see both from our upstairs window. The Skybar transforms the stunning cliffs of St. Agnes into a vibrant pop-up beach club for the bank holiday weekend. I’m sure they will keep us on our toes as they grow older, lying awake waiting for them to get home!

Two powerful strategies to improve your luck!

The title is a big statement to start this month’s blog: can we really influence our luck? There have been times when I’ve felt incredibly unlucky, but can you change your life with a few tweaks? Well, yes, I believe you can, and I’ll share some insight on how!

Much research has investigated the beliefs and experiences of lucky and unlucky people. The results from these studies share a radical new way of looking at luck and the important ways we can make our own. Here are my top two.

Missed Opportunities

There’s a great book written by Richard Wiseman called “Did You Spot the Gorilla?”. The gorilla in the book’s title is an analogy for an opportunity or solution that we cannot see, even though it is close to us, often because our attention is focused elsewhere.

We’ve all missed opportunities, those moments when we look back and think, “If only I had taken that chance.” Apart from our lack of attention, another reason for missing opportunities is fear of failure; we doubt we are competent enough to make it work.

This confidence crisis happened to me in 2008. Jamie and I had the opportunity to start our own business. It was the best decision we ever made and afforded us a lifestyle we loved. To begin with, I had so many doubts about whether I was good enough to make it work. We had a mortgage and many other outgoings, and we were doomed if we failed to secure a regular income. However, we stuck with the plan, seized the opportunity, and never looked back.

People used to say, “You’re so lucky to be able to run your own successful business.” I don’t see it that way; we grasped the opportunity and worked hard, creating our own luck, which leads me nicely to the second point I want to make—a behaviour that increased our luck tenfold!

Talk to anyone and everyone.

Building and maintaining a network of people you respect, like and admire is the biggest ingredient in creating your luck. Opportunities come from people; the more people you talk to, the better your chances of having someone think of you when they hear about a great opportunity or a super new job.

Jamie is much better at this than me but I’m improving. A high proportion of our business came through people we knew. We networked, networked and networked some more. If you talk to people, you will learn about anything and everything. Learning is valuable; your next big opportunity or a solution to a problem might come from a discussion in the pub or a queue in the coffee shop. Be inquisitive, ask questions, and learn everything you can, even in the butchers; butchers are a wealth of knowledge 😊

Most people I know undervalue the importance of networking. I appreciate that it’s not easy and certainly outside my comfort zone. However, my advice is that building a wide network and talking to as many people as possible each day can increase your odds of success. In other words, you can create your luck. Let’s not lose our ability to share conversations by hiding behind email and social media. People who have more social interactions are happier, healthier and luckier.

Before I go, I wanted to share an update on my AS. Luck isn’t as easy to influence when it comes to our health. I got the results of my recent MRI scans, which showed more inflammation and more deterioration in my spine, especially my cervical spine.

Biological drugs have improved dramatically since I was first diagnosed. Called TNF inhibitors, these drugs are injected weekly and are proven to slow down the damage caused by inflammation. While there is no cure, as well as slowing down the progress of the disease, it relieves many of the other challenges associated with autoimmune diseases.

Now, here’s the interesting bit! The last time I was prescribed these, I ended up in A&E on intravenous steroids due to a nasty reaction, meaning I had to stop injecting immediately. As you can imagine, I’m looking forward to my new prescription arriving!

Watch this space, and don’t let the “L” in your luck get replaced with an “F” 😊

Until next time xx

Five life lessons everyone should read!

Five life lessons everyone should read

Hello everyone, and welcome to my blog. If you’re looking for profound insights, you’ve come to the wrong place. But buckle up if you’re in the mood for serious stuff and the odd chuckle; it’ll be worth the read.

We all learn lessons in life. Sometimes, we learn the hard way, and sometimes we learn too late. When I was young, we were told to listen to our elders, which still holds today. Not because they are always right, but because the older we get, the more experience we have of being wrong! So, with many wrong decisions behind me, here are my top five life lessons.

Stay alive and out of jail.

When I was 16, I was in a car with someone who shouldn’t have been driving, and we crashed. All 5 of us in the vehicle escaped with relatively few injuries, even though the car was a right-off. It was a wake-up call.

I’ve also witnessed the devastation caused when a friend of mine was responsible for an accident in which someone died.

Last year, nearly 400 people were killed in collisions in the UK where at least one driver was over the drink-drive limit. That should enough make you think twice; you’ll either die, suffer life-changing injuries or serve a jail sentence. This doesn’t just apply to young people; although they are 4 times more likely to be killed or seriously injured than drivers or passengers over 25, it applies to all of us.

Don’t abuse drugs and alcohol.

When I worked in the City, I volunteered for homeless charities. This experience helped me understand more about drugs and alcohol dependency. Some people who drink or take drugs are looking to escape the reality of life. At its core, escapism is often a response to tragic life circumstances. But some people take drugs because they like the “feeling”; even recreational drug taking can lead to addiction.

Drugs were rife in my City days; I never felt the urge; I drank champagne instead 😊. Fortunately for me, I was shown a video in my last year of school, the story of a young girl with a heroin addiction. The life she led was so terrible and had such an impact on me that I can still recall it. Show your teens the worst documentary you can find (there are many recommendations). Hopefully, it will have the same impact on them that it had on me.

Life is a series of natural and spontaneous changes; trying to escape the reality of life creates sorrow. Let reality be reality. Most days are ordinary, some are amazing, and some are awful; we have to accept that.

Take care of your health.

I was distraught when I got my AS diagnosis in 2015, which is why this subject is close to my heart and why I work hard to keep as healthy as possible.

You may believe you have all the time in the world to think about your health, but most people live their later years in poor health because of damage done in earlier ones. Can you imagine getting to your retirement age and not being able to enjoy it? Here’s a frightening government statistic for you. 8 in every 10 people aged between 40 and 60 in England are either overweight, drink too much or get too little exercise. WOW! Be one of the 2 and live your best life when you stop working.

Be kind and practice gratitude.

Seriously, this works. Being kind and practising gratitude daily is one of the easiest and most satisfying things you can do. Spending 5 minutes at the beginning of the day making a mental list of the things you are most grateful for does help to stop you from moaning. Everyone seems angry about everything these days, and the effect of anger on our well-being is negative. Chill out, and don’t read fake news; it’s there to wind you up.

And don’t forget the golden rule: spend any spare hard-earned cash on experiences rather than material things; it increases happiness 😊

Not everyone will like you, FACT.

We are not designed for everyone to like us, so accept it. I tried too hard to be liked, and it’s not good for you; it only leads to disappointment. Although it may feel personal, it’s often not about you; it’s about them; there are just some people with whom we don’t vibe well. Don’t let it worry you like I did; accept it and move on.

None of this is rocket science; these are five common-sense points gathered through my lessons learned. It’s good to remind ourselves how to live our best lives.

Before leaving, I’ll finish with a quick update on my AS. I had my bi-annual MRI scans last week (cervical spine, thoracic spine, lumbar spine, and sacroiliac joints ). Results are expected soon, so my fingers are crossed. MRI scanners have improved massively since I started my journey into these loud, claustrophobic tunnels. Scanning my bits takes nearly an hour, and I was pleasantly surprised to see a video screen showing Caribbean beach vibes and relaxing waves when entering the scanner. I almost fell asleep.

Remember, lots of us are walking around like everything’s fine, but deep down, inside our shoe, our sock is sliding off.

Thank you for reading and sharing my blog to raise autoimmune disease awareness. Until next time xx

Austria’s Salzkammergut

Our trip to the Austrian Alps was definitely an adventure, as things sometimes go differently than planned. Fortunately, life has taught us that when you make a plan out of the unplanned, you can make the best of the unlikely obstacles that get in the way. So, what went wrong?

We landed at Salzburg airport during one of the worst storms Central Europe had ever experienced. “Boris,” as it was known, battered Austria, and the local news channels made alarming viewing. We spent two wet days exploring what Salzburg had to offer in torrential rain before attempting to leave the City to start our seven-day hiking trip.

On arrival at Salzburg’s central station, floods across the country were causing havoc and significant train delays; the advice was not to travel. We called our guest house, who confirmed they were accessible, so we decided to attempt the journey as the weather was due to improve later that day.

When we booked this trip, we knew snow could fall at altitude in September, but the levels seen during Storm Boris were unprecedented. Remarkably, our train journey was without incident, and the sun shone brightly on our arrival at our first destination, St. Agatha.

The snow looked magnificent, untouched and pure, ready for hiking boots to make their mark. The guest house was serene, set in the lush green valley, capturing the quiet atmosphere that often accompanies snow on the towering mountains surrounding us.

Our first two days hiking around St Agatha were amazing. Breathing in the fresh Alpine air was so refreshing. We connected with nature, listened to the distant clanging of cowbells on the pastures, and admired the views across the jagged mountains and a snow-capped glacier high above. We walked through dark green forests and pale grass meadows and kept to the lower ground routes until we had time to investigate the accessibility of the altitude hiking, and we weren’t disappointed.

We left St. Agatha on day 3 to walk to the historic town of Hallstatt along the lakeside, considered one of the most beautiful routes in Austria, and it was. When you book through the travel company we use, you only carry your day sack. Your luggage is taken to your next location on transfer day, and is waiting for you on your arrival.

After such a beautiful day walking, we arrived in Hallstatt, and I have ever seen so many people taking photographs. Don’t get me wrong; Hallstatt is stunning, but the number of tourists was overwhelming after the remote beauty we’d encountered before our arrival. It seemed particularly popular with Koreans, and I was so intrigued that I had to Google to find out why. I learnt that Hallstatt was featured in a South Korean romantic drama, which was so popular that a replica of the town was built in China. It was also thought to have inspired the fictional village of Arendelle in the Disney movie Frozen. Its beauty was contagious, but I found it too commercial, and I felt sad for the locals. The town has had to introduce daily limits on the number of buses and cars that can enter, and some residents have erected wooden walls to block views of their houses. One house had a sign saying “no photographs,” but there must have been over 50 people standing outside pointing their iPhones at their private residence.

Our goal was to get up high, and the Dachstein Krippenstein, at around 2,100 Metres, was our goal. It had been closed since our arrival in Salzburg, but our timely arrival at Hallstatt meant that some access routes were open, and we would ascend by cable car. We were able to access the Ice Caves, which were magnificent, and we managed some high alpine hiking, taking in the panorama views as far as the eye can see. The scenery will remain in my memory forever.

From Hallstatt, we moved on to Gossau, and once again, we were in awe of the spectacular sights. This magnificent alpine village is famous for its view across the glassy lake, and we sat and had coffee admiring the perfect reflections of pine trees, jagged mountains and the via ferrata which I decided I didn’t want to try!

Again, some of the altitude walks were closed. Nearly 2 metres of snow had fallen during Storm Borris, and skis would have been more helpful than our walking boots. However, despite compromising on some routes, I wouldn’t have changed the weather, as it gave us the most fantastic experience of hiking in panoramas you can only dream about.

The accommodation on our trip was lovely. Dinner was home-cooked in St. Agatha and Gossau, and the apple strudel was delicious. The good thing about a hiking holiday is that you don’t have to worry about calories.

On our last evening, we sat outside with a beer and watched the sun drop behind the mountains whilst admiring the views of the Dachstein Glacier.

“There is wisdom in climbing mountains… For they teach us how truly small we are.” Jeff Wheeler

Until next time xxxx

Sex, Drugs and Rock and Roll!

Wow, it’s been ages! Life got in the way, but I’m back, and boy, has a lot happened since I’ve been away. I’m pleased I’m here in Cornwall; life here is different and a world away from Twitter 😊

I guess you’re eager to know why I chose this title and where the phrase “Sex, Drugs, and Rock & Roll” came from. It first appeared in a 1969 LIFE magazine piece. In 1977, the phrase took off after Ian Dury released a song using the expression in the title. Then came a 2010 biographical film about Ian Dury’s hedonistic lifestyle, which stuck. It’s a great film, by the way.

But how do Sex, Drugs, and Rock and Roll relate to my blog? Fortunately, or unfortunately, whichever way you view it, it’s not my autobiography; that would be much more interesting 😊.

The link is “freedom of speech.” We all appreciate freedom of speech as the bedrock principle of democratic societies, however in the 60’s and 70’s, many songs related to sex, drugs and rock and roll were banned. This caused much debate about the freedom to express oneself, even if they were risque. Banned songs were always my favourites, but I guess that’s my rebellious streak coming out. Freedom of speech is also very important to me.

As someone who doesn’t sit on the fence (it’s too boring), I strongly believe everyone should have the right to express opinions without censorship, restraint or legal penalty. However, here is the important bit: freedom of speech completely differs from hate speech, which has become a huge problem and, in my view, endangering our democracy.

To be clear, hate speech is any form of expression through which speakers intend to vilify, humiliate, or incite hatred against a group or a class of persons based on race, religion, sexual identity, ethnicity, disability, or national origin. Hate speech is commonly spread via social media platforms, and in my humble opinion, the line is being crossed.

I don’t know how to fix this, but I hope someone does soon because, without a fix, we’re doomed. That sounds dramatic, but our right to speak freely is a prerequisite for all our other freedoms and living in a free society. Can you imagine no defence at a trial?

Moving on to something more cheerful, how many of you shop online for groceries, and is your supermarket as bad as mine? To avoid using hate speech, I won’t name them, but……..coffee (strength 5) substituted with coffee (strength 2)—WTF!

Lastly, I wanted to talk about a “call to action.” During my sales and marketing training, I was always taught to end my written communications with a “call to action,” which refers to the next step a marketer wants its audience to take after reading their marketing bumph or, in my case, my blog. It can be as direct as “click here to BUY NOW” or softer, such as “read more”,. It’s getting your audience to do a specific action, so I thought I’d try it. I’ve racked my brains to think of something that didn’t sound like I was lecturing about Free Speech so the only call to action I could think of is, wait for it!

Stay classy….

Thank you for reading and sharing my blog to raise autoimmune disease awareness. I’m good for those who have asked, thanks to lots of exercise, particularly Yoga, a good diet and lots of fun.

Until next time xxxx

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