Living-your-best-life

One powerful tip for a better 2025

First, let me say Happy New Year, and good luck sticking to your New Year’s resolution. Last year, I decided to teach my facial expressions how to express their inner voice. It has worked somewhat, but I can’t get rid of the eye roll, so that’s my focus for this year.

Before you make your resolution, I want to share the most valuable advice I’ve ever received. Someone once told me it was the best tip I would ever get, and I can confidently say they were right. If you take this advice, you’ll feel happier, less anxious, and more in control; imagine that!

So, what is it, I hear you ask? Let me explain.

We all have a worst enemy, and you might be surprised to learn that it’s not the “know it all” mother in your school WhatsApp group or the workplace bully. It’s something far worse, a constant nagging commentary that lingers in your head 24/7—our inner voice. Sometimes, it offers a helpful idea, but more often than not, it’s negative. When it finally goes quiet, we worry about what it’s plotting next, and hey presto, it’s back!

This inner voice reminds you that the crisis you’re experiencing will lead to the worst possible outcome, almost like a detailed itinerary of all the negative possibilities. This gremlin also surfaces as you fall asleep, casting doubt over everything you’ve accomplished during the day. Additionally, it seems to criticise your outfit just before you go out. For me, it often appears when I’m writing my blogs, making me feel like I’m wasting my time since no one will read them. 😊

Vincent Van Gogh got it right when he said, “If you hear a voice in your head saying you can’t paint, then paint, and that voice will be silenced.” Vincent echoed the advice I received but I’ll try to add some detail and helpful takeaways.

So, how do we silence the pesky thing?

Let’s begin by giving it a name. Naming helps us acknowledge its presence and allows us to observe when and how it appears. Fun options like “Nagging Nelly” or “Perfect Pete” come to mind, but they feel too long for me. Instead, short names like “Midge” or “HIC” (Hidden Inner Critic) or something playful that makes you smile might be easier to relate to.

Next, we need to learn techniques to eliminate it. We can’t live our best lives with a gremlin who continually sabotages our success in both our professional and personal lives, disrupts our sleep, and makes us unnecessarily anxious.

Perhaps you didn’t apply for that job because you couldn’t meet two of the ten required competencies. Maybe you didn’t ask for a pay raise this year because you didn’t feel it was justified. After all, the gremlin might reason that if you deserved a pay raise, your employer would have given you one. Perhaps your day is full of worry instead of laughter because you always think about a worst-case scenario planted in your head by our nemesis.

However, now that you have a name, you’re more aware of its presence, and you have the power to tell it to “bugger off”. I might use “different words” in a more private setting, but they wouldn’t be appropriate for my blog 😊. This approach may help you block it out temporarily, but here’s what you must do if it returns. This advice I’ve followed works: don’t worry about how silly you might look or sound; just crack on.

When you wake up in the morning and take a look at yourself in the bathroom mirror, the first words out of your mouth should always be, “Gremlin (replace with chosen name) is an a**hole”, and repeat it 3 times. Trust me; it will banish that irritating inner voice for the day and equally put a smile on your face.

Don’t get me wrong; I’m not saying you should ignore your intuition or gut feeling; ignore the Gremlin. It will be mightily peeved, but stay strong, and you’ll beat it.

Moving on, my focus for 2005 is recognising that health involves much more than exercise and proper nutrition. It encompasses having a healthy mindset, surrounding ourselves with positive people, cultivating uplifting habits, and embracing gratitude.

Remember, there are two rules in life.

Never share all the information

On that note, Alexa, I’d be very grateful if you could take down the Christmas decorations.

Until next time xx

Unlocking the power of Emotional Intelligence can transform your life—do you possess this vital skill?

Hi everyone, it’s me again. I appreciate that this is my second blog in a month, but after researching, I’ve realised I need to challenge my brain more. Now that I’m retired, I’ve noticed that at least 80% of my day revolves around active pursuits like yoga, gym, hiking, and photography—I’m rarely still. I also enjoy reading and love writing, so I’ve decided to focus on those activities more. I bet you can’t wait to read more of my thoughts! My last blog about St. Agnes garnered the highest readership this year, so here we go again!

When I wrote about this topic last year, it was my most popular post in the four years I’ve been blogging. Today, I want to take a different approach to the same subject: Emotional Intelligence, or EQ. I hope you find some valuable takeaways from it, as, apparently, it’s the key to happiness.

First, let’s clarify what Emotional Intelligence (EQ) is: it refers to our ability to manage our own emotions while also understanding the feelings of others. EQ consists of four key elements: self-awareness, self-regulation, social awareness, and social skills. I’ll explain these components further later in this blog.

On a personal note, I don’t wish to blow my own trumpet, but remarkably, I have a high EQ score. I only mention this to establish my credibility in this area. Thankfully, this is a positive trait, especially since I suspect my IQ score is rather average. 😊

How do I know this? Without going into too much detail, I was tested in my last proper job, a relatively senior role. As part of the management team, we needed to recognise our strengths and weaknesses to communicate effectively and lead our team to the best of our ability, ultimately resulting in a happier workforce. Therefore, we all underwent a full analysis day, followed by an official emotional intelligence (EQ) test.

Let me share an example. I personally dislike excessive detail, but some people thrive on it, and that’s simply how they communicate. Having a high emotional intelligence (EQ) means that instead of looking bored, I can recognise that my impatience isn’t a good trait. Even though I understand what they are saying within the first few seconds, I remain attentive for the next 5 minutes and don’t lose my sh*t. That’s being self-aware.

Some of our management team members had low emotional intelligence (EQ) scores. This didn’t make them better or worse than me; it simply highlighted our differences. I worked alongside incredibly intelligent people—many of whom were much smarter than I am—and I often wondered how I ended up in my position. I can only guess that my high EQ enabled me to navigate through all the difficult times.

So, let’s look at what’s possible and what you can take away from reading my blog.

Firstly, can you increase your IQ, or are you born smart? Sorry, folks, but experts generally agree there’s no effective method to boost intelligence directly. Factors like diet, brain training, exercise, willpower, or inspiration do not significantly affect IQ. However, some researchers have found that a rigorous academic curriculum can improve IQ scores, but only slightly.

But all is not lost. While we may not be able to boost our intelligence significantly, we can elevate our emotional intelligence (EQ) at any stage in life. The exciting part is that the skills associated with EQ can be learned and refined! It’s vital to understand that grasping EQ concepts is just the start; putting them into practice is where the real transformation happens. Even if emotional intelligence doesn’t come effortlessly, with dedication, mastering these invaluable skills is entirely achievable!

So, what are the traits of people with high EQs?

Number one is Self-awareness. It’s an incredible skill that allows us to recognise and understand our emotions and how they affect those around us. It’s the foundation of emotional intelligence (EQ) and supports all other aspects of it.

When we develop self-awareness, we unlock the power of self-regulation—the ability to manage our emotions and behaviors effectively. This journey starts with recognizing our feelings, which helps us maintain control during challenging situations. Individuals with strong self-regulation can pause and take a deep breath in tense moments instead of losing their temper, throwing objects, and slamming the door on their way out. I know! this is difficult!

Next is social awareness. Those who score highly in this area can empathise with others and grasp their emotions, fostering stronger connections.

Finally, social skills are the hallmark of a greatness. These skills encompass influencing others, managing conflicts, and inspiring those around us. Mastering these abilities is essential for nurturing and sustaining healthy relationships in all areas of life, not just at work.

Imagine this scenario: you’ve had a stressful day at work, it’s nearly Christmas, and you still haven’t done any shopping. To make matters worse, Sainsbury’s delivered six bottles of wine instead of your entire Christmas order because you mistakenly left them in your holding basket. On top of that, the kids have just finished school for the holidays! Those of us with high EQ can stop ourselves from poking our own eyes out, screaming, or drowning our sorrows in wine. But it does take practice😊

On that note, with my self-awareness skills fully engaged, I will say goodbye before I bore you to death. If you managed to read to the end, well done! If you gave up halfway through, you missed the best part.

Ho Ho Ho and a bottle of Merlot, until next time xx

St Agnes, Cornwall

I get so many messages asking, “Where do you live”?, so I thought the easiest way to reply was through a short blog. As many of my readers know, I write about life events and the challenges of living with an autoimmune disease. I’m also a travel writer and photographer, and whilst I’m not getting paid for this one, yet 😊, it combines both subjects, life and travel, so here goes….

We live in St Agnes, on the North Coast of Cornwall, between Newquay and St Ives. When you leave Devon and see the “Welcome to Cornwall” sign, we’re another 56 miles southwest down the A30. You don’t quite fall off the end of England, but we’re close. We had been holidaying in St Agnes for about 20 years before we finally made the big decision to move here from the Surrey commuter belt.

Following many hard-working years, with long but enjoyable days in the City of London, we decided to embrace the freedom and joy that retirement offers, using the hard-earned savings from our working years to enjoy life to the fullest. I’ve always loved the weather in Cornwall, whatever the season. We are heavily influenced by the Gulf Stream, resulting in a mild, maritime climate with more sunshine and warmer temperatures than other parts of the UK. The Winters are milder than most of the UK, too, but with lots of dramatic storms regularly roaring in from the Atlantic,

It’s not that this was an influencing factor, but St Agnes houses six amazing bars/pubs, one of which was recently voted “best in the UK”—yes, the best pub in the whole of the UK! Two are located in Trevaunance Cove, our magnificent sandy beach nestled below the high cliffs. It’s great for families and surfers alike, with plenty of rock pools to explore at low tide.

Each pub regularly hosts live music, quiz nights, DJs, and even the occasional beer festival. The variety of food is amazing, with a superb array of seafood, including the best fresh lobster available. We also feature a superb Indian restaurant.

Jamie and I love them all, but my favourite is the one that transports you to Hawaii for the night, even in the depths of winter. It exudes a unique charm that’s fun and uplifting, even on a damp day. We also have three breweries, a great butcher, a bakery renowned throughout Cornwall, fresh veg shops, a delightful antique shop and many more. Our fish and chip shop is five-star, and you can’t beat a freshly cooked fish supper to take up to the cliffs and watch the magnificent sunsets. Oh, and a couple of tinnies from the breweries, too 😊.

The first time Jamie and I visited Australia, we loved the café breakfast culture, which we also have here, with one café right on the beach. What can be better than drinking proper coffee while storm-gazing in the Winter, watching the expertise of the surfers riding the waves in Spring and Autumn, or the turquoise glistening waters and white sand in the Summer. Next door to the café is one of the bars serving wine, beer, and excellent pizzas, for all your stunning evening sea views too

Now, you might think that’s all, but it isn’t. Our house is only a few minutes walk from most of the eating and drinking venues I’ve mentioned, but here’s the thing: It’s also a few minutes walk to the top of the breathtaking cliffs, where you can stand and admire the glittering expanse of the Atlantic Ocean, spot dolphins swimming alongside the fishing boats or walk along one of the most magnificent sections of the southwest coastal path.

Whilst we have the sunniest climate in the UK, if you prefer basking in 24/7 sunshine by the pool, Cornwall may not be your ideal destination. You’ll want to pack a summer hoodie, and your Ibiza attire should be swapped out for shorts and flip-flops. My wardrobe is filled with clothes and high-heeled shoes that are now relegated to my weekly dusting routine; that’s the only time they get my attention! If you don’t swim or surf, I suggest avoiding matching dry robes for you and your partner, as they look weird.

If you want to visit in the winter, be prepared, as our ferocious storms don’t receive names or colourful warnings from the Met Office. They are wild and dramatic, making them perfect for my new hobby: photography. I love trying to capture the waves breaking around the rocks in the shallows. The foam crests become chaotic, creating what surfers refer to as “messy” seas.

We’re also steeped in history. St Agnes was recently featured in BBC’s “Villages by the Sea” informing us that ‘St Agnes tin is the finest tin in Cornwall’. The area produced some of the best tin ore in the world, including ‘diamond’ tin, which needed little processing. Our historic mining landscape is included as one of the ten areas of the Cornish Mining World Heritage Site.

People are said to be happiest and healthiest in small, picturesque Mediterranean villages, largely due to their friendly lifestyles and nutritious diets. We believe we have that experience here in Cornwall. Jamie plays league cricket for Gulval, a village team that boasts one of the best views from any wicket in the country. He also plays for Cornwall in the over-60s, and through cricket, we have made many new friends across the county.

Many of our friends are “blown-ins,” like Jamie and I, who have made their home in this magnificent county. Leaving our previous home was a big step, but it’s only a four-hour drive, and most people here regularly make the journey to visit friends and family up-country. We have daily flights from Newquay Airport to London, as well as an excellent train service to the big City! Our house is a 20-minute drive from the airport and only 20 minutes from Truro, Cornwall’s big city, where we enjoy a superb theatre and, more importantly, my new hairdresser. We’re still season ticket holders at Wimbledon, and our trips to visit family somehow always coincide with home games. 😊

Making life-changing decisions is difficult, but you must be brave to embrace retirement and truly enjoy it. Life here is relaxed, and we hope our grandchildren will create wonderful memories during their time in St. Agnes. Two of Cornwall’s biggest summer festivals, Boardmasters and Tunes in the Dunes, are just a bus ride away, and we can see both from our upstairs window. The Skybar transforms the stunning cliffs of St. Agnes into a vibrant pop-up beach club for the bank holiday weekend. I’m sure they will keep us on our toes as they grow older, lying awake waiting for them to get home!

Two powerful strategies to improve your luck!

The title is a big statement to start this month’s blog: can we really influence our luck? There have been times when I’ve felt incredibly unlucky, but can you change your life with a few tweaks? Well, yes, I believe you can, and I’ll share some insight on how!

Much research has investigated the beliefs and experiences of lucky and unlucky people. The results from these studies share a radical new way of looking at luck and the important ways we can make our own. Here are my top two.

Missed Opportunities

There’s a great book written by Richard Wiseman called “Did You Spot the Gorilla?”. The gorilla in the book’s title is an analogy for an opportunity or solution that we cannot see, even though it is close to us, often because our attention is focused elsewhere.

We’ve all missed opportunities, those moments when we look back and think, “If only I had taken that chance.” Apart from our lack of attention, another reason for missing opportunities is fear of failure; we doubt we are competent enough to make it work.

This confidence crisis happened to me in 2008. Jamie and I had the opportunity to start our own business. It was the best decision we ever made and afforded us a lifestyle we loved. To begin with, I had so many doubts about whether I was good enough to make it work. We had a mortgage and many other outgoings, and we were doomed if we failed to secure a regular income. However, we stuck with the plan, seized the opportunity, and never looked back.

People used to say, “You’re so lucky to be able to run your own successful business.” I don’t see it that way; we grasped the opportunity and worked hard, creating our own luck, which leads me nicely to the second point I want to make—a behaviour that increased our luck tenfold!

Talk to anyone and everyone.

Building and maintaining a network of people you respect, like and admire is the biggest ingredient in creating your luck. Opportunities come from people; the more people you talk to, the better your chances of having someone think of you when they hear about a great opportunity or a super new job.

Jamie is much better at this than me but I’m improving. A high proportion of our business came through people we knew. We networked, networked and networked some more. If you talk to people, you will learn about anything and everything. Learning is valuable; your next big opportunity or a solution to a problem might come from a discussion in the pub or a queue in the coffee shop. Be inquisitive, ask questions, and learn everything you can, even in the butchers; butchers are a wealth of knowledge 😊

Most people I know undervalue the importance of networking. I appreciate that it’s not easy and certainly outside my comfort zone. However, my advice is that building a wide network and talking to as many people as possible each day can increase your odds of success. In other words, you can create your luck. Let’s not lose our ability to share conversations by hiding behind email and social media. People who have more social interactions are happier, healthier and luckier.

Before I go, I wanted to share an update on my AS. Luck isn’t as easy to influence when it comes to our health. I got the results of my recent MRI scans, which showed more inflammation and more deterioration in my spine, especially my cervical spine.

Biological drugs have improved dramatically since I was first diagnosed. Called TNF inhibitors, these drugs are injected weekly and are proven to slow down the damage caused by inflammation. While there is no cure, as well as slowing down the progress of the disease, it relieves many of the other challenges associated with autoimmune diseases.

Now, here’s the interesting bit! The last time I was prescribed these, I ended up in A&E on intravenous steroids due to a nasty reaction, meaning I had to stop injecting immediately. As you can imagine, I’m looking forward to my new prescription arriving!

Watch this space, and don’t let the “L” in your luck get replaced with an “F” 😊

Until next time xx

Five life lessons everyone should read!

Five life lessons everyone should read

Hello everyone, and welcome to my blog. If you’re looking for profound insights, you’ve come to the wrong place. But buckle up if you’re in the mood for serious stuff and the odd chuckle; it’ll be worth the read.

We all learn lessons in life. Sometimes, we learn the hard way, and sometimes we learn too late. When I was young, we were told to listen to our elders, which still holds today. Not because they are always right, but because the older we get, the more experience we have of being wrong! So, with many wrong decisions behind me, here are my top five life lessons.

Stay alive and out of jail.

When I was 16, I was in a car with someone who shouldn’t have been driving, and we crashed. All 5 of us in the vehicle escaped with relatively few injuries, even though the car was a right-off. It was a wake-up call.

I’ve also witnessed the devastation caused when a friend of mine was responsible for an accident in which someone died.

Last year, nearly 400 people were killed in collisions in the UK where at least one driver was over the drink-drive limit. That should enough make you think twice; you’ll either die, suffer life-changing injuries or serve a jail sentence. This doesn’t just apply to young people; although they are 4 times more likely to be killed or seriously injured than drivers or passengers over 25, it applies to all of us.

Don’t abuse drugs and alcohol.

When I worked in the City, I volunteered for homeless charities. This experience helped me understand more about drugs and alcohol dependency. Some people who drink or take drugs are looking to escape the reality of life. At its core, escapism is often a response to tragic life circumstances. But some people take drugs because they like the “feeling”; even recreational drug taking can lead to addiction.

Drugs were rife in my City days; I never felt the urge; I drank champagne instead 😊. Fortunately for me, I was shown a video in my last year of school, the story of a young girl with a heroin addiction. The life she led was so terrible and had such an impact on me that I can still recall it. Show your teens the worst documentary you can find (there are many recommendations). Hopefully, it will have the same impact on them that it had on me.

Life is a series of natural and spontaneous changes; trying to escape the reality of life creates sorrow. Let reality be reality. Most days are ordinary, some are amazing, and some are awful; we have to accept that.

Take care of your health.

I was distraught when I got my AS diagnosis in 2015, which is why this subject is close to my heart and why I work hard to keep as healthy as possible.

You may believe you have all the time in the world to think about your health, but most people live their later years in poor health because of damage done in earlier ones. Can you imagine getting to your retirement age and not being able to enjoy it? Here’s a frightening government statistic for you. 8 in every 10 people aged between 40 and 60 in England are either overweight, drink too much or get too little exercise. WOW! Be one of the 2 and live your best life when you stop working.

Be kind and practice gratitude.

Seriously, this works. Being kind and practising gratitude daily is one of the easiest and most satisfying things you can do. Spending 5 minutes at the beginning of the day making a mental list of the things you are most grateful for does help to stop you from moaning. Everyone seems angry about everything these days, and the effect of anger on our well-being is negative. Chill out, and don’t read fake news; it’s there to wind you up.

And don’t forget the golden rule: spend any spare hard-earned cash on experiences rather than material things; it increases happiness 😊

Not everyone will like you, FACT.

We are not designed for everyone to like us, so accept it. I tried too hard to be liked, and it’s not good for you; it only leads to disappointment. Although it may feel personal, it’s often not about you; it’s about them; there are just some people with whom we don’t vibe well. Don’t let it worry you like I did; accept it and move on.

None of this is rocket science; these are five common-sense points gathered through my lessons learned. It’s good to remind ourselves how to live our best lives.

Before leaving, I’ll finish with a quick update on my AS. I had my bi-annual MRI scans last week (cervical spine, thoracic spine, lumbar spine, and sacroiliac joints ). Results are expected soon, so my fingers are crossed. MRI scanners have improved massively since I started my journey into these loud, claustrophobic tunnels. Scanning my bits takes nearly an hour, and I was pleasantly surprised to see a video screen showing Caribbean beach vibes and relaxing waves when entering the scanner. I almost fell asleep.

Remember, lots of us are walking around like everything’s fine, but deep down, inside our shoe, our sock is sliding off.

Thank you for reading and sharing my blog to raise autoimmune disease awareness. Until next time xx

Austria’s Salzkammergut

Our trip to the Austrian Alps was definitely an adventure, as things sometimes go differently than planned. Fortunately, life has taught us that when you make a plan out of the unplanned, you can make the best of the unlikely obstacles that get in the way. So, what went wrong?

We landed at Salzburg airport during one of the worst storms Central Europe had ever experienced. “Boris,” as it was known, battered Austria, and the local news channels made alarming viewing. We spent two wet days exploring what Salzburg had to offer in torrential rain before attempting to leave the City to start our seven-day hiking trip.

On arrival at Salzburg’s central station, floods across the country were causing havoc and significant train delays; the advice was not to travel. We called our guest house, who confirmed they were accessible, so we decided to attempt the journey as the weather was due to improve later that day.

When we booked this trip, we knew snow could fall at altitude in September, but the levels seen during Storm Boris were unprecedented. Remarkably, our train journey was without incident, and the sun shone brightly on our arrival at our first destination, St. Agatha.

The snow looked magnificent, untouched and pure, ready for hiking boots to make their mark. The guest house was serene, set in the lush green valley, capturing the quiet atmosphere that often accompanies snow on the towering mountains surrounding us.

Our first two days hiking around St Agatha were amazing. Breathing in the fresh Alpine air was so refreshing. We connected with nature, listened to the distant clanging of cowbells on the pastures, and admired the views across the jagged mountains and a snow-capped glacier high above. We walked through dark green forests and pale grass meadows and kept to the lower ground routes until we had time to investigate the accessibility of the altitude hiking, and we weren’t disappointed.

We left St. Agatha on day 3 to walk to the historic town of Hallstatt along the lakeside, considered one of the most beautiful routes in Austria, and it was. When you book through the travel company we use, you only carry your day sack. Your luggage is taken to your next location on transfer day, and is waiting for you on your arrival.

After such a beautiful day walking, we arrived in Hallstatt, and I have ever seen so many people taking photographs. Don’t get me wrong; Hallstatt is stunning, but the number of tourists was overwhelming after the remote beauty we’d encountered before our arrival. It seemed particularly popular with Koreans, and I was so intrigued that I had to Google to find out why. I learnt that Hallstatt was featured in a South Korean romantic drama, which was so popular that a replica of the town was built in China. It was also thought to have inspired the fictional village of Arendelle in the Disney movie Frozen. Its beauty was contagious, but I found it too commercial, and I felt sad for the locals. The town has had to introduce daily limits on the number of buses and cars that can enter, and some residents have erected wooden walls to block views of their houses. One house had a sign saying “no photographs,” but there must have been over 50 people standing outside pointing their iPhones at their private residence.

Our goal was to get up high, and the Dachstein Krippenstein, at around 2,100 Metres, was our goal. It had been closed since our arrival in Salzburg, but our timely arrival at Hallstatt meant that some access routes were open, and we would ascend by cable car. We were able to access the Ice Caves, which were magnificent, and we managed some high alpine hiking, taking in the panorama views as far as the eye can see. The scenery will remain in my memory forever.

From Hallstatt, we moved on to Gossau, and once again, we were in awe of the spectacular sights. This magnificent alpine village is famous for its view across the glassy lake, and we sat and had coffee admiring the perfect reflections of pine trees, jagged mountains and the via ferrata which I decided I didn’t want to try!

Again, some of the altitude walks were closed. Nearly 2 metres of snow had fallen during Storm Borris, and skis would have been more helpful than our walking boots. However, despite compromising on some routes, I wouldn’t have changed the weather, as it gave us the most fantastic experience of hiking in panoramas you can only dream about.

The accommodation on our trip was lovely. Dinner was home-cooked in St. Agatha and Gossau, and the apple strudel was delicious. The good thing about a hiking holiday is that you don’t have to worry about calories.

On our last evening, we sat outside with a beer and watched the sun drop behind the mountains whilst admiring the views of the Dachstein Glacier.

“There is wisdom in climbing mountains… For they teach us how truly small we are.” Jeff Wheeler

Until next time xxxx

Sex, Drugs and Rock and Roll!

Wow, it’s been ages! Life got in the way, but I’m back, and boy, has a lot happened since I’ve been away. I’m pleased I’m here in Cornwall; life here is different and a world away from Twitter 😊

I guess you’re eager to know why I chose this title and where the phrase “Sex, Drugs, and Rock & Roll” came from. It first appeared in a 1969 LIFE magazine piece. In 1977, the phrase took off after Ian Dury released a song using the expression in the title. Then came a 2010 biographical film about Ian Dury’s hedonistic lifestyle, which stuck. It’s a great film, by the way.

But how do Sex, Drugs, and Rock and Roll relate to my blog? Fortunately, or unfortunately, whichever way you view it, it’s not my autobiography; that would be much more interesting 😊.

The link is “freedom of speech.” We all appreciate freedom of speech as the bedrock principle of democratic societies, however in the 60’s and 70’s, many songs related to sex, drugs and rock and roll were banned. This caused much debate about the freedom to express oneself, even if they were risque. Banned songs were always my favourites, but I guess that’s my rebellious streak coming out. Freedom of speech is also very important to me.

As someone who doesn’t sit on the fence (it’s too boring), I strongly believe everyone should have the right to express opinions without censorship, restraint or legal penalty. However, here is the important bit: freedom of speech completely differs from hate speech, which has become a huge problem and, in my view, endangering our democracy.

To be clear, hate speech is any form of expression through which speakers intend to vilify, humiliate, or incite hatred against a group or a class of persons based on race, religion, sexual identity, ethnicity, disability, or national origin. Hate speech is commonly spread via social media platforms, and in my humble opinion, the line is being crossed.

I don’t know how to fix this, but I hope someone does soon because, without a fix, we’re doomed. That sounds dramatic, but our right to speak freely is a prerequisite for all our other freedoms and living in a free society. Can you imagine no defence at a trial?

Moving on to something more cheerful, how many of you shop online for groceries, and is your supermarket as bad as mine? To avoid using hate speech, I won’t name them, but……..coffee (strength 5) substituted with coffee (strength 2)—WTF!

Lastly, I wanted to talk about a “call to action.” During my sales and marketing training, I was always taught to end my written communications with a “call to action,” which refers to the next step a marketer wants its audience to take after reading their marketing bumph or, in my case, my blog. It can be as direct as “click here to BUY NOW” or softer, such as “read more”,. It’s getting your audience to do a specific action, so I thought I’d try it. I’ve racked my brains to think of something that didn’t sound like I was lecturing about Free Speech so the only call to action I could think of is, wait for it!

Stay classy….

Thank you for reading and sharing my blog to raise autoimmune disease awareness. I’m good for those who have asked, thanks to lots of exercise, particularly Yoga, a good diet and lots of fun.

Until next time xxxx

Gen Z, the game-changing generation we’ve been waiting for!

When I was growing up, I was a parent’s nightmare child. I couldn’t understand why old people were grumpy and these dividing lines between the young and old are widening. The phrase “respect your elders” is true, but older generations must also play their part and embrace change.

To put this blog in perspective, the Baby Boomers were born from 1946 to 1964. Next came Gen X from 1965 to 1980, and then the Millennials, followed by Generation Z, born between 1995 and 2010. The younger Gen Z’s are still in full-time education, like our granddaughter, and the older ones are causing chaos in the workplace.

I’m only joking, of course, but I suggest anyone who manages these guys or is a parent, grandparent, teacher, or coach read on! By understanding their unique characteristics and adapting our approach, we can foster better relationships and guide them in their personal and professional lives.

It’s not just Gen Z creating dividing lines. Before their arrival, millennials were critical of baby boomers, who, in their eyes, “had it all”! Who could forget the Australian real estate guy who retaliated by telling Millennials they couldn’t buy a house because they were spending all their money on avocado toast? This economic disparity between the older and younger generations, despite the humour, is a significant factor influencing Gen Z’s priorities.

Millennials witnessed a huge increase in higher education costs, entered the workforce during a historic recession and a high percentage of Millennials cannot get a foot on the housing ladder. Job security is a thing of the past, and final salary pensions are the stuff of dreams! Yet, with their unique resilience, Gen Z is not just navigating these challenges, but redefining success on their terms.

Gen Z is the most diverse generation yet. In the US, followed closely by Europe, nearly half (48%) are from racial or ethnic minorities. This diversity fuels a progressive desire for fairness for all—whatever their race, sex, or sexual orientation. This inclusive mindset is fundamental to Gen Z’s unique characteristics, and we must understand and appreciate it.

So now we’ve put their early years into perspective; this is where the interesting bit starts, and my research has surprised me if I’m honest. Is Gen Z the game-changing generation we’ve been waiting for?

Having grown up in an era of social media, global connectivity, and heightened social awareness, Gen Z is more likely to yearn for careers that resonate with their values and contribute to the greater good. In a recent survey, 70% of Gen Z indicated that making money was very important to them regarding life goals, and only 12% wanted to be famous—a stark contrast to similar surveys on Millennials. In other words, they are prepared to work hard.

But!

They are making very different choices, particularly regarding education and careers. Given the impact of economic pressures and student loan debt on the Millennial generation, Gen Z is seeking career stability. 85% of 2023 grads said job stability would make them more likely to apply for a position. They focus more on managing their finances, and big brands must rethink as Gen Z adopts a more cautious mindset, cutting back on luxuries and non-essential products. They won’t buy from brands who don’t respect their values. Whilst they are starting to prove their worth in the workplace, flexible hours are a deal breaker if not offered.

Parenting or managing Gen Z can be challenging.

In the workplace, they value a human-first approach. Clear expectations and communication are vital, as are their career opportunities and learning potential. At home, they want to be treated with respect and sensitivity. Respecting their boundaries is one of the best ways to establish trust. If they tell you something makes them uncomfortable, the best thing to do is try to understand and respect this.

I can’t finish this without mentioning Gen Z’s mobile use. Remember, during Covid, not much was available outside of those screens. Gen Z weren’t just encouraged to spend more time online; they were mandated to for school. Setting rules makes them more rebellious. The solution to smartphone addiction is a lot more complex and doesn’t reside in strict regulations. Parents must consciously try to help them find a balance between the phone and their lives. The link between mental health and social media is too complex for me to address with so much contradicting information available, so I’m going to end with my wit instead 😊

I’m a baby boomer (only just!). Yes, I know I had it all: paying 20p for petrol and buying my house for £15 after working part-time for six months. But here’s the thing! The Millennial and Gen Z kids think they’ve had it bad dealing with us Baby Boomers, but it’s a big “cheers” from my champagne bottle to Gen X, who has been dealing with us for 40+ years.

Thank you for reading and sharing my blog to raise awareness of autoimmune disease. Gen Alpha it’s over to you.

Until next time xx

Spain, The Mountains of Andalucia

Hi, and welcome to this month’s blog. It’s a bit late because I’ve just been on one of the best holidays ever! I appreciate that’s a big statement, but let me explain why.

Jamie and I love to hike, but until last year, we’d never exchanged our beach holiday for a walking one. We went to Andalucia in March 2023, and both agreed it had been the best holiday we’d ever taken. This made us nervous about booking a second one just in case it wasn’t as good. Was it? Read on, and I’ll reveal all.

An early flight meant a 3.30 am alarm on day one. This was accompanied by an email cancelling our taxi transfer from Gran Canaria Airport to our first destination. We should have booked the transfer through Inntravel (our holiday agent). Still, we’d used this transfer company many times before and assumed it would be OK. We didn’t panic as we were confident we’d pick up a taxi at the airport on arrival, which we did. Our driver was a lovely chap who’d lived in Gran Canaria all his life but had never driven to our hotel! Alarm bells?

We hadn’t studied how many metres Cruz de Tejeda was above sea level. Everything looks flat on a map 😊. To give you an idea, Scafell Pike, England’s highest mountain, is 970 metres above sea level. Our destination was 1510 metres above sea level! Our taxi wasn’t the most powerful, and our driver followed his SatNav, which always goes for the shortest and most traumatic route possible. He was ecstatic when he reached the top of the mountain pass, and so were we. We later discovered the Inntravel transfer company was a chap who lived in the mountains and knew roads well and the best route!

On arrival, I was stunned by the magnificent view and completely in awe of this unexpected landscape. Relaxing on our balcony with the mountains ahead, their imposing height and rugged terrain were magical. A foundation of trees and shrubs, grassland with blue skies above was the most idyllic real-life picture I’d ever seen, impossible to capture on camera. I couldn’t wait for our first sunset and the three days of walking ahead.

After the best breakfast, the walks didn’t disappoint: outstanding hiking with sweeping views of the cliffs and ravines of the collapsed volcanic crater of Tejeda. We chose a holiday with grade 2-3 walks as we like a challenge, but you could easily find leisurely trails. We sampled the hotel’s amazing spa, crossed many paths among the splendid mountains, and enjoyed the sunshine and skyburst red and yellow sunsets before the stars stole the evening show.

After four nights in this paradise, transfer day arrived, and it was hammering down! The mountains had disappeared, replaced by low clouds and mist. We debated whether to set off, but due to the length of the walk ahead, we needed to get going as the weather forecasted thunder and lightning later that day. We were lucky; we didn’t get too wet and arrived just as the first clap of thunder could be heard in the distance.

If you want to disconnect from everybody and everything, this next location is just for you. It’s perfect for enjoying nature. It’s a family-run business with a lovely lady called Fatima caring for every detail. Unfortunately, Gran Canaria experienced one of its worst storms with extreme cold for our one-night stay. A small electric heater in our cabin and two extra blankets helped, but with the thunderous claps overhead, a frightened barking dog and church bells on the hour every hour, it was an interesting stay. A superb breakfast awaited us, and a hearty picnic was provided for our onward hike to our final location.

There’s a lot of elevation gain and decent over the seven days, and this route to Agaete, our final destination, was no exception. It was tough, and our knees started to feel the 1000m descent of the Barranco. We were exhausted on arrival at our Finca, but another wonderful welcome in an idyllic setting soon made us forget our weary legs. This colonial mansion dates from 1895. Mountains encircled the Finca’s abundant orchards of oranges and lemons. Set in a deep valley, craggy peaks loomed above us in a dramatic backdrop to breakfast as we sat in the courtyard.

The last two days of walking took us to the highest peaks and our most difficult walks. A hair-raising descent down a steep, sloping mountainside with ravines and abrupt cliffs finally opened up to the spectacular coastline, with views similar to those of England’s beautiful Cornish coastline, our home. Our final two evenings were spent in Puerto de Las Nieves, where the restaurants are frequented predominantly by Gran Canaria locals who know it as a good place to go for a seafood meal. Watching the sun go down where the mountains meet the sea, feeling proud for pushing ourselves beyond our limits and eating freshly prepared paella was the perfect end to another fabulous holiday.

Life definitely begins outside of your comfort zone. Until next time xxx

Four controversial statements, I wonder what you’ll think?

Hi, and welcome to this month’s blog. I hope you’re ready for this, as I’ll make four controversial statements that stop many of us from living our best lives. I may not be right but what about the possibility I am?

Moaning requires no skills or talent whatsoever, which is why so many people do it. Optimism, on the other hand, requires constant application, hard graft, and resilience
We’re ageing before our time. It’s not just how we look; many don’t look after their overall health.
No matter what some people do, it seems they think they deserve a trophy… when they don’t get a trophy, they are completely unprepared.
Actions have consequences. Not all of our society are taught or understand this valuable lesson

I’ll briefly tackle these statements and provide some wisdom on each. When I was growing up, advice from older generations was viewed as valuable. We’ve lost our respect for this guidance somewhere, but I’ll share mine anyway. You never know; you might find it useful.

Moaning versus optimism is an easy one. Everyone has problems, some worse than others, but if we can’t change life events, we may as well choose to shift our mindset and approach them with a calmer attitude. I see anger everywhere today. There’s no benefit to feeling negative and approaching things with a cloud of gloom. Being cheerful and optimistic are the keys to success in life, work, health, and well-being.

We’re increasingly ageing before our time. When you’re in your 20’s, 30’s, and even your 40’s, growing old seems so far away that it’s not a priority. I get it! You’re busy; life is difficult enough without thinking about depressing stuff like old age, but 60 is the new 50. Don’t you want to enjoy your life when you have more time and less worry?

We’re programmed to think our younger days are best. Parties, boozing, late nights, festivals, concerts, spontaneity, wild holidays; BUT, and here’s the thing, if you look after yourself, you can still do all those things when you age; Jamie and I do 😊. I may not binge drink regularly and prefer a glass of red with dinner, some cheese, or perhaps a G&T over lunch, but this slight moderation won’t stop the fun! Looking after your face, body, and overall health isn’t difficult. Skip the lip fillers (they look terrible), don’t lie in the sun or use sunbeds (you could get skin cancer and wrinkles), exercise, floss your teeth every day and avoid drinking and eating too much; you don’t need that much; trust me!

And now for the real rant! This flipping trophy thing started with the schools and has escalated. What’s wrong with some people being good at sports and others being better academically? Not everyone can run a 100m in under 10 seconds. It’s also true that some people are good at everything. Yes, it’s annoying, but get over it; they deserve the trophy, but most people don’t.

The concept of everyone being a winner is this. Younger generations are spoiled products of a self-esteem culture in which they fear failure. Because of this, children grow up thinking they’re far more talented than they are, and they expect approval in every area and fail to learn how tough life is. They are unable to accept constructive criticism because it hurts their feelings. I believe this weakness of character will continue to erode our culture, but someday, they’re in for a rude awakening.

Finally, what do I mean by actions have consequences. Think about this: Everything we think, say, and do has consequences for ourselves and others. We need to remember that our actions are irreversible. Consequences are where our thoughts and actions meet reality. Today, people often think they are free to choose whatever action they want to take in life and believe they are free from the consequences of those actions. Sadly, they often are because parents, teachers, or our law and order don’t enforce the consequences. We must get better.

Wrapping up, I appreciate we live in a world where we have become accustomed to getting everything at the speed of thought. Patience is not seen as a virtue; impatience is the way most of us work. Why go through a fitness regime when you can use a pill? Why work hard when there is a get-rich-quick scheme or hack? We attribute the success of the wealthy, the top athlete, or the successful actor to luck. So many people ignore or are not interested in the failures and the struggles people encounter to be successful.

Our thoughts and behaviours must change to live our best life. Otherwise, life will be dull and miserable, feeling entitled to more rather than working hard and being grateful for what we have.

“To live is the rarest thing in the world. Most people exist, that is all.” – Oscar Wilde.

Until next time xxxxxx

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